Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
