New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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