Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Randomize
