things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
This is my gift to your gina
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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