The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
