forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize