i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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