Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
