I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
you didnt know i had herpes?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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