My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You were trust falling into bushes
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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