She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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