I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
