I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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