So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
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