We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
