I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
They should really pass out barf bags in church
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
