oh god the rape fog is back!
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
