She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
my shit smells like andre
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Found the puke drawer
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Randomize
