in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I want to fling myself into the sun
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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