Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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