Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
