I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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