just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
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Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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