They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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