I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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