shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize