we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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