you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
