we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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