um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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