Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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