I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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