even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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