TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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