Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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