Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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