can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
