dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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