I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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