I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
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He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
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I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free