There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
