The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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