Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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