I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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