I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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