I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
