I'll bet she douches with gravy.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
