2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
