Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.