I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
